Grace at Home (2)

Grace at Home (2)


“If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation.”                         2Co 5:17 NKJV

Here are three more steps to treating your spouse with grace: (1) See them as God created them to be. Focusing on your partner’s flaws doesn’t help either of you. The Pharisees saw only the worst in the woman caught in adultery. Jesus didn’t minimize her sin, but chose to see what she could become through grace. “I don’t condemn you. Go, and stop what you’re doing” (See Jn 8:11). Grace enables you to see beyond your spouse’s upsetting ways and work with God in helping them become the “new creature” He’s called them to be. (2) Celebrate them. Too often we try to impose on our spouse our desired image of them. We resent them and insist they change, see it our way, and do things to our required standard. If they don’t, we think they’re inconsiderate, unloving, even un-Christian. Grace doesn’t operate that way! It understands, accepts, forgives, and leaves changing others up to God. Try telling yourself, “Yes, that annoys me, but I wonder what God’s trying to work out in my spouse.” Then step back, love and accept them and let God work on them. (3) Forgive them. Your spouse will irritate you at times because of what they are. We’re all different. She thinks she’s detailed; he thinks she’s nit-picking. He thinks he’s laid-back; she thinks he’s lazy. We act out the image we hold of ourselves, and that’ll change only when God changes it! Acknowledge your intolerance and forgive your partner’s irritating behaviors—even before they do them. That’s “pre-emptive forgiveness,” the kind that denies resentment a toe-hold on your marriage.

2 comments (Add your own)

1. Virginia Gaffney wrote:
When I go away on short trips (like yesterday and the day before) these thoughts, as above, convict my heart. I have not tried celebrating my husband though. I do think of five things I like about him. Such as he wakes up st 4:00 PM in the morning and walks the dogs; he is very intelligent and loves to read; despite depression, he will hug me when I ask ( and it usually is a long strong, genuine hug), he loves God and goes to Mass every Sunday, he loves me, our children and grandchildren in his heart. On September 24, we celebrate 35 years of marriage and we will be going on a trip to Tennessee and Arkansas (near Eureka Springs, Warron is a fully professed "Brother" of a Catholic monastary there founded by John Michael Talbot " Brothers and Sisters of Charity". I ask God for more grace for both of us. Easy to go our merry own way and not relate to each other...for fear the differences, interests, hobbies, desires are so different. We use to pray together but husband prays when he walks the dogs and resists praying with me when I ask because I like to pray for the children ( 5 of ours) and grandchildren with him. Too many he says. So there you go. God bless you and thanks for your very helpful Encouraging Words! :)

Fri, August 30, 2013 @ 11:29 AM

2. Virginia Gaffney wrote:
Hey there John. A relative of yours, Barbara Swafford was one of my best buddies when I lived in Knoxville, Tennessee. She caught the bouquet at our wedding 35 years ago only to be married a year later to Stewart. Super Cool! We have lived in British Columbia, Canada for the last 34 years:)

Fri, August 30, 2013 @ 11:34 AM

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